Since you asked, you're an asshole. But that has nothing to do with this issue.
You are not making unreasonable requests. However, this is not really a rational situation, so I think you should cut her some slack.
To make both of you happy, I suggest asking her to do one or two specific things that need done. Stay supportive of her search, but you should realize that askin her to do "most" or "all" of the housework won't fly.