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To be honest, I think it's clear you either have to get over it, or have A Talk.
And I don't mean get over it by deciding to put up with it, I mean get over it.
I'm guessing this isn't going to happen, since it's been so long that this has been an issue for you.
If you have a talk with her, I'm guessing that using the word 'fat' is likely to be a quick way to end the relationship, and you have to understand that this is likely a relationship-ending conversation no matter what.
If she *does* want to make a change to her weight and physical fitness (not for you, but for her), then maybe you can work something out that you do together - diet, exercise, etc that you do as a couple.
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