Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - Do you think that once a man strikes a woman....

The_Dunedan · 05-28-2008, 04:55 PM

Just chiming in here to say that context needs consideration, along with intent and effect.

Violence within a relationship is intolerable, an absolute no-no. I don't care if it's your spouse, significant other, sibling, or roomate. The use of violence within a relationship is an attempt to establish dominance and control over another human being. The only -possible- exceptions I can see are when a point needs making RIGHTNOW, such as when I (6 years old at the time) accidentally "swept" my father's face with a .22 rifle. I woke up looking at the sky and wondering why my head hurt, but you can bet your skivvies I never did -that- again.

However, violence for the sake of dominance and control is another matter and is a sign of, as my Granny used to call it, "bad breeding." And well-bred people (such as those of us who know not to wail on our spouses) do not, should not, MUST not, associate with "badly bred" people. As Boston T. Party once put it, this is more than simple self-preservation, this is quality control

On the other hand, there's violence in self-defense. If someone comes after me with a weapon or with violent intent, I will use the minimum level of force which will preserve my life and liberties. If that minimum level happens to be a .45 because the person's coming after me with a boning knife, so be it, and I couldn't give a rat fart what their sex is.

My suggestion/opinion: Ladies, if your partner becomes violent, ESCALATE. Catastrophically and at once. Put the fucker down HARD. RIGHT NOW. Then leave without looking back. Guys, if your partner becomes violent, leave without looking back. The only reason for the difference is that most men are more than strong enough to shrug off most fists-and-feet assaults from a woman*, while the inverse is not true. It's all about being physically safe enough to walk away without looking back. And THAT'S the important part.

Leave. Don't look back.

*Some exceptions apply. I've met women martial artists like Gini Lau and Laura Truley whom I wouldn't take on with anything less than a 12-gauge.

05-28-2008, 04:55 PM	#40 (permalink)
The_Dunedan Junkie	Just chiming in here to say that context needs consideration, along with intent and effect. Violence within a relationship is intolerable, an absolute no-no. I don't care if it's your spouse, significant other, sibling, or roomate. The use of violence within a relationship is an attempt to establish dominance and control over another human being. The only -possible- exceptions I can see are when a point needs making RIGHTNOW, such as when I (6 years old at the time) accidentally "swept" my father's face with a .22 rifle. I woke up looking at the sky and wondering why my head hurt, but you can bet your skivvies I never did -that- again. However, violence for the sake of dominance and control is another matter and is a sign of, as my Granny used to call it, "bad breeding." And well-bred people (such as those of us who know not to wail on our spouses) do not, should not, MUST not, associate with "badly bred" people. As Boston T. Party once put it, this is more than simple self-preservation, this is quality control On the other hand, there's violence in self-defense. If someone comes after me with a weapon or with violent intent, I will use the minimum level of force which will preserve my life and liberties. If that minimum level happens to be a .45 because the person's coming after me with a boning knife, so be it, and I couldn't give a rat fart what their sex is. My suggestion/opinion: Ladies, if your partner becomes violent, ESCALATE. Catastrophically and at once. Put the fucker down HARD. RIGHT NOW. Then leave without looking back. Guys, if your partner becomes violent, leave without looking back. The only reason for the difference is that most men are more than strong enough to shrug off most fists-and-feet assaults from a woman, while the inverse is not true. It's all about being physically safe enough to walk away without looking back. And THAT'S the important part. Leave. Don't look back. Some exceptions apply. I've met women martial artists like Gini Lau and Laura Truley whom I wouldn't take on with anything less than a 12-gauge.