Originally Posted by Tully Mars

Then they have their own deficiencies. Doesn't mean a parent who let his one year old toddler wander off any less at fault when ill happens to that toddler. And it doesn't mean everyone with the opinion that the father actions were less then responsible have these deficiencies.

In a weird way this whole things reminds me of an incident that happened not long after I left the Navy. I went to work at a correctional work camp for juvenile offenders. One of the men, Alan, that worked there was a complete asshole. He was the second guy in charge. He fucked with the kids minds, he screwed with peoples schedules just for the fun of it. One time he fucked with a low IQ kid so bad the kid went out and burned a hole in his hand with a lit cigarette, by the time I got out to talk to him he was shaking and crying so hard he had stuff coming out his eyes, nose and mouth. Alan told him he'd be getting a home visit with his mom, then that he wouldn't, then he would and then back to no. He did this for days, finally the kid snapped. He came in at night and banged one of the co-workers in the back room leaving word if his wife called to tell her he was "out." He was an all around ASSHOLE. A little after a year on the job I came in one day and just walking in the room you could tell something was wrong. I asked "what's going on?" The manager told me maybe I should sit down. Shit I thought something happened to my wife or daughter. I sat and the manager explained to me "Alan, had a massive heart attack last night- he didn't make it." My first thought was "Ok, whats the bad news?" People sat around that office a lamented what a great guy Alan was. No Alan was an asshole, you all hated this guy... with a fucking passion. I didn't say a word. I sat and listened as these people spoke of all the nice things Alan had done, a lot of which was simply fiction. It was as if his dying made him a good guy. My thought was he was a live asshole and now he's a dead asshole, one less asshole in the world. Everyone wanted to go to the service, being low man I was scheduled to work. Fine by me, they gave me a "grief day" later that week. I took my kid fishing and never once thought of Alan. I never expressed to anyone there that I didn't think Alan's death changed the fact he was an awful human being. Nor would I tell the parent involved in this case that I think he's responsible, in any way, for his child death. But post it on a board I'm fairly certain he's never going to see, uh yeah.