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Originally Posted by Giant Hamburger
A female once remarked to me that she liked how, during our mating ritual, my heroically sized spermatophore-bearing tentacle detached itself from my undercarriage and using jet propulsion from pressurized air-sacs for locomotion, blasted across the kitchen floor and then sensuously crept beneath her receptive mantle.
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I'll be sending over my carpet cleaning bill as I just spit coffee out through my nose after reading this... excellent!