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Originally Posted by abaya
Vanblah, I asked this question in post #43, didn't get much reply... I saw it as a positive way to try and change the conversation, at least on the male side:In fact, throughout my posts I have attempted to NOT group "all men as pigs," instead saying that I believe men are better than that. But many of those responding to this thread seemed to insist that they were, in fact, NOT above that level... and to quit expecting them to be any more advanced, so I'd better just lighten up and get over it. So I'd like to say that I think men deserve a lot more respect than they get re: this topic, but it seems that few *want* to rise to that level of respect/responsibility and act accordingly.
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Do you see the sanctimony in that statement? "Men are better than that."
I know that you probably don't intend it to sound sanctimonious but it really can come across that way.
As well as the fact that it STILL puts the male gender in control: men have to change the way they act so that women don't get offended.
The fact is, change must happen on BOTH sides here. Men
DO need to change the way they act with regard to women just as much as women need to change they way they RE-act to the male pattern of behavior. The reverse is also true: Women need to change the way they act and men need to change the way they RE-act to the female pattern of behavior.