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Stress does a lot of strange things to your body and mind. In normal life, it's easy to notice only the coincidences that seem strange, the phenomenon is called synchronicity.
When you're desperate for a sign, your brain can come up with one to help you cope. The bedside encounter sounds like a stress-induced hypnogogic hallucination (also see: sleep paralysis,) which a lot of people experience regularly and can certainly be brought on by stress. It's odd that your daughter would have a similar experience, but she must be stressed even if only because she sees your reaction to losing your father. During surgery and under general anesthesia, people see all sorts of things, and a comforting sight to help keep you calm is not much of a stretch of the imagination.
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