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Originally Posted by mixedmedia
Therefore, if the situation were that I didn't want to have anal sex, then we just wouldn't be having anal sex.
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Right, so there would be no possibility for persuasion, which means that you wouldn't fit into the category I made here:
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Originally Posted by abaya
Next, you would have to be the type of person who might be persuaded into trying it, but only if someone else goes first
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... and therefore my recommendation would not apply to you. Easy as that.
Look, folks, I don't mean to force a way of thinking on people here. It's just that I think if *particular* circumstances/personalities (the ones I outlined earlier) exist in a given sexual situation, then things can be done to explore the possibilities together. I don't think it's that strange of an idea, really. I do think all parties reserve a veto right to whatever they're uncomfortable with, obviously!
But for *me,* I prefer that sexual vetoes come from a place of information and at least giving the idea a fair chance (even in one's head), not from a place of knee-jerk fear, which is where a lot of the posts come from that bother me. When one is looking at a potential lifetime of marriage, and the idea of exploring things sexually with one other person... I just feel like both people have to be a little more open and a little less fearful with new things.