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Tilted Cat Head
Administrator
Location: Manhattan, NY
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the way i heard the joke...
Quote:
Once upon a time, a multi-millionaire entrepreneur found himself overwhelmed by too, too many obligations. Jetting off to board meetings all over the world left him absolutely no time for himself.
So he invested some of his great wealth into having himself cloned and began to send his spitting image off to the far reaches of the globe to serve in his stead.
But something had gone horribly wrong in the cloning process: the Clone, while his exact double in appearance, was, for reasons his makers could not explain, incredibly profane. Every other word out of his mouth was highly objectionable. Like a Tourette's sufferer, his verbal output had no built-in censor. In the middle of a business meeting a string of swear words might pour forth, to the great shock of those present. Around women, the Clone was especially offensive, making utterly inappropriate remarks.
Since no one knew of the Clone's existence, everyone assumed the foul-mouthed one was the Millionaire himself. Needless to say, his reputation, previously unassailable, was becoming severely tarnished.
The Millionaire, anxious to put a stop to the deterioration, called the Clone in for a meeting. In a penthouse apartment on the twenty fifth floor of a New York high rise, the Millionaire and the Clone had a heart-to-heart, but it did not go well. The two came to blows, in the process stumbling out onto the balcony, from which the clone plummeted to his death.
Though startled by this unexpected outcome, the Millionaire felt no guilt. The Clone was his; he owed his existence solely to his actions. So what if he had killed him. No crime, he told himself, had been committed. He sat down, fixed himself a Manhattan, and relaxed.
His peace was soon disturbed, however, by a loud knock on the door. When the Millionaire answered, he found the cops there, guns already drawn.
"Is that your double down there, sir--the dead one prostrate on the roof of a car?" Without hesitation, the Millionaire acknowledged the being as his. "Well then," the cop insisted, "you are under arrest."
"For what?" the Millionaire responded defiantly. "What am I charged with?"
"Of making an obscene clone fall," the cop answered.
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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.
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