I agree with all of you that this is a moral predicament and dangerous ground to tread, no question about it. One hopes that each of us is true and steadfast in our promises and that we treat one another with respect, whether we know them or not. What I wonder though is if the new lover is kept totally separate and knows absolutely nothing of the other committed relationship except that it exists, what responsibility do they have to that committed relationship? Doesn't the responsibility and the immorality fall to the one in the committed relationship who has made a promise, whose behavior is contrary to that by taking a lover? The new lover has made no commitment to their partner's partner. Does it make a difference if the lovers remain companions for years and years while the one continues in the committed relationship?
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