My finger points to the truth!
It's no longer a secret and has been replaced by a new one...RATS!
They now flourish in my attic.
After consulting with the very expensive experts on rat warfare I have concluded that I will conduct the distasteful police action on my own.
Certainly there will be a period of violence when I lose myself in the dusty jungle of my attic. Heavily laden with snap traps, my peanut butter painted face will hardly be recognizable to my loved ones as they avert their wide-eyed gaze from my blood-stained necklace of ears on a cord woven from the severed tails of furry terrorists.
Feel free to give me your suggestions as how to successfully accomplish my mission. I hope that soon we shall drink wine together from the tiny chisel-toothed skulls of my hated enemy.
THERE WILL BE BLOOD!
(and possibly pics)
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