Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Shaindra
You're not going to change the situation by bitching about it. The best thing to do is choose to trust her until you have reason to do otherwise. And then try to make sure that her major needs are getting met in your relationship so she doesn't need to go looking outside.
|
I agree that the current boyfriend would look bad if he is insecure enough to have a problem with the friendship. But I feel that this is also about 'power' in the relationship. He now
has to be a good boyfriend and not do anything wrong, or he'll think that you will just breakup with him and have a real easy time finding another relationship.
He can't control her and say "I don't want you seeing your ex anymore". Then the ex could talk to her and say that her new guy is bad for her, and is she really happy being controlled like that...
As a guy, I know that if I weren't getting some from my current girlfriend (because of a fight, travel, or overworking), buy my imaginary hot ex-girlfriend wanted me. It would be too easy to sleep with her again, rather than find a different girl. I could use the "I slept with the ex before I got into this relationship, what is so wrong with one or two more times." And then by the time the current girlfriend gets back from a two month, three month, year long trip, well the old girlfriend was there, and the excuses start. So then her choice is to take me back or give up (and I would get back with the ex-girlfriend).
It just brings more headaches than it's worth. There are a lot of other people out there that are friendly and interesting.