yeah...you're right.
there are two different things mixed up in your op, shauk, in my opinion--there's what this sort of press stuff is when you read it just to read it--and then there's the question of how much latitude you have to screw about with the form in the context of a press kit--which is not about what these things *are* but rather about what you want them *to do for you* as a musician.
1. what they are:
bios/puff pieces are written in a kind of icky passive voice, mostly in order to obscure the simple fact that they are written by the people they are about.
you can't just do the anti-thing because, well, it's not a new idea in itself--so if you screw around with this format, and it's part of your press kit, unless it's really slick at the levels of form and content, you're basically saying:
"hi there...don't hire me. i'm an amateur. i think i'm funny. so i'm likely to irritate you too."
there are a ton of musicians in the world, and this sort of stuff annoys everyone, so don't imagine you're the first to notice something kinda fake about it. just saying. i've learned this over time....i still dislike this level of the game. but i've resigned myself to it, because its a means to an end.
you could make an artist's statement--they're a bit less obnoxious versions of the same thing--but they are written in the first person. the point behind them is basically "I'M INTERESTING!" but the fact that they're less goofy at the level of writing makes them feel and read as less obviously false documents. there are lots of types of artist statements--you can tweeze about the web and find lots of examples. some are shorter, some longer, some biographical and others about the conceptual underpinnings of the work being done, etc etc etc.
whether this makes sense is a function of the kind of spaces you want to play: if you're after a more recital=hall type gig, then they're functional--if you want to spin sets in a club, they don't help. for my collective, playing clubs is not really an option, so we have to present ourselves in a way that positions us in between being musicians and sound artists--so we have a package that we send out shaped by that.
the aspect of all this that annoys me more is the list of reviews--but that's i think mostly because we're outside the normal run of music and critics tend to work inside rigid genres--they know the form, but are not necessarily musicians themselves and so there's no reasons to expect that they will know what the fuck they are talking about when it comes to something new or that they aren't exposed to on a regular basis. there are exceptions, of course, but in the main, it's a pretty annoying thing. but if you're working inside a straighter or more mainstream form, it might look differently to you, so chock this one up to my own experience.
2. on what you want this to do:
anyway, you have to remember what all this crap is about:
a. providing some idea for the person who books a club that you are a plausible draw
or:
a.1) that if you're starting out, you're professional enough that you won't drive out people who are there just because.
but the main thing is that:
what any of us who does this sort of thing wants
is for the person who books the venue
to listen to the demo.
that's where the real evidence is about what you do and how you do it--you dont want to create any pretext for bookers not to listen to it.
there are alot of bands, alot of djs out there. there are alot of people looking to get gigs.
behind this is the rather pathetic reality of the situation---ESPECIALLY when you're first starting to take your stuff out:
if you're looking to play clubs, in a way the gigs aint about you.
you fit into the picture as a way for a club to generate revenue for itself: so
it's about selling drinks and getting the percentage off the door.
so don't get all confused and imagine that any of this is about your music in itself.
it isn't.
that's maybe why the publicity aspect has so little to do with what you actually do--they're separate from each other in fact.
you'll have more options in terms of how you present yourself as you build up a profile through playing out, building an audience or whatever.
but remember this (i have to remind myself about it too, because i get irritated by the same kind of thing..)
folk have to know you exist to like your music.
i would imagine that you want folk to like your music.
so dont do things that will reduce the possibility of this win-win situation happening.
but all this applies mostly at the level of the material you send out.
3. on the list of performances:
so far as this "artist's resumé" or list of gigs is concerned, i think you just have to suck it up and deal. i wouldn't suggest putting pretend gigs on it.
i dont know why. karma maybe.
with my collective, it took us five years of arranging EVERYTHING about performances in philly--before there was an experimental music scene of any coherence in the city--to build up a resume solid enough to start working for us. when the scene did take shape, we found ourselves--to our shock--kinda important within it, and we started getting asked to do alot of work. but then we left.
here in chicago, i had a residency that gave us both support to work and a lot of publicity, but its still not obvious after that how to go about breaking into the scene here.
it's a project.
it's possible that you can release a demo cd and it opens up alot of stuff for you--but it's more likely that you just have to decide to go through the grind of making this a priority for you and doing the grunt work required to get the experience and exposure you need.
hell, everyone would like to be "discovered" in the way columbus "discovered" america--everyone would like to quit their day gig and just do music.
maybe that's why its so rare that it happens--the pool is full of people swimming about waiting to be discovered.
it's like playing the lottery, except it's more likely you'll win the lottery.
but hey, maybe you'll be the exception and all this will turn out to be wrong.
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a gramophone its corrugated trumpet silver handle
spinning dog. such faithfulness it hear
it make you sick.
-kamau brathwaite
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