I got togther with my wife at 17, and we split at 34. Based on your tale our lives were similar to yours.
She worked, but only part time, and it was never a partnership of equals.
As for the issue of "if you have a cleaner would that be OK", I'd say it's not the issue.
In my office we COULD hire extra staff, and allow some people to sit on their arses, but we don't - we don't because it's a group of people who all input.
In this marriage, he works, she sits on her arse. That is not equitable, it's not respectful, and it's not fair.
If you can't respect someone, you can't love them.
If you pay, don't move out. Get her out. If you can't get her out, at least move into a different room, or sleep on the couch.
Arrange your finances to protect yourself.
Take legal advice.
Don't fight.
__________________
╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine
╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
|