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Ok, first, I think your ratio is a little off.
According to the UN Statistics Office, in the USA in 2005 there were 103 women to every 100 men.
Where I live, in Portugal, it's 107 to every 100.
Granted I don't know the ratio of single heterosexual women to single heterosexual men.
I think there are certain tasks or activities that women generally would like their guy to do for them at times, but they are still quite willing to do them themselves when they must and when they want to.
I think particularly the idea of the guy being the protector is a romantic notion that most women like occasionally. I'm sure lots of guys also like to feel they are the protector occasionally too. Guys occasionally like to feel mothered, and many women take on that role occasionally because they also like it.
The idea of the guy being the provider is no longer as important, to most women I think. To me anyway, it has no relevance.
That doesn't mean relationships today can't be on a more balanced level, so that both people in the relationship have the power to make choices. That's not how it was before. I think that it's a good thing that we are all more responsible for our own path in life.
It may seem to you that you're the one putting in the most effort to get a girl to pay attention to you. I feel that often it works the other way, at least for me. You see, it's all about perspective.
One relationship I was in, I felt like I was being pushed into the "housewife" and "nurturer" role often. It's a two-way street.
I do agree that there is a game involved, when it comes to getting someone to go out with you, most of my girl friends play it, but it's just a form of protecting yourself. You don't want to be the initiator and you also don't want someone to step all over you. A little give, a little take.
I personally am not one to sit around and wait for what I want, generally. But I have also learned that often, if you reach out and just "grab" it, guys suddenly aren't that interested. One of my friends has said to me: you choose, but you have to make him think that he chose you.
I personally don't like the "game", but it's there. I apparently suck at it and I just wish things were a lot more sincere.
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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.
Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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