Girls are vastly varied in this, and advice will only be helpful insomuch as that other women have successfully had or not had orgasms during vaginal intercourse. TotalMILF never had orgasms during intercourse (with me at least) until about a year after our son was born. One day she was on top and found the right movement and spot and BAM! There it was! After that, she could get it 9 times out of 10. Before that we would have our fun for however long we both could go, then I'd help her help herself. *shrug* As long as she was happy with it, so was I.
My ex was a very "difficult O". She simply could not orgasm except by very specific manual stimulation (much like what you describe with your gf). She had to be on her side with her legs clenched together. Any other way was simply not gonna happen. *shrug*
The one piece of advice I DO believe is pretty universal is that any pressure she feels to orgasm will result in no orgasm or fake orgasms. Either way, it's not a good plan.
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