abaya

I guess I take issue with the tone I'm perceiving here; correct me if I'm wrong. Do you have a problem with her getting off on a pillow, and not with you? My advice is to let her orgasm whatever way she wants to, whether that involves you or not. It'll either happen with you eventually, or it won't. Either way, don't let your ego get involved, or she'll resent you for it.

Is she as anxious as you are about her orgasms? Is she doing any research on her own? How long have you two been together? Has she orgasmed with partners before? What is her history of masturbation, and comfort with sex in general? These things all matter.

For what it's worth, with my first (and pretty much only) partner, I didn't orgasm with him for a good 6 months after we got together. The more I stressed about it, the more difficult it became to get to that point. Even now, it almost never happens with vaginal sex, only with oral and anal (and we've been married for 3 years now)... and that's okay with both of us. Every human body is different.

__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran