For someone so caught up on the semantics of his own posts, you're quite liberal with your own reading. What mandy said is not that someone should have a threesome because their partner wants it, but that someone should be willing to have a
discussion with their partner about it if they want it. There is a
huge difference, and if you're not willing to have discussions with your partner about things they want even if you're not initially interested in it, then that's a recipe for a lot of problems in a relationship.
Statistics.....I like statistics. I really do. They're good things, and while they can't tell you how to act, they certainly give perspective and guidance. Thing is, I haven't seen any statistics here. That's great if your professor told you something, but let's see the study. I'd particularly like to see the part where they specifically compare the failure rate of relationships that have threesomes vs relationships that do not include threesomes, controlling for length of relationship, age, upbringing, socio-economic class, and all the other necessary variables. The fact is that almost every single relationship ever started eventually ends. Some go long-term, even fewer end up with a lifelong commitment, but the overwhelming majority end. That a large number of relationships which include threesomes end is not something that concerns me. In fact, I consider it obvious.
To use your own statement, threesomes "exacerbate" problems - in other words, they do not create them. Anyone who has had a successful threesome can tell you that they
do exacerbate problems. Issues are brought to light that may not have been otherwise realized. The differences come in how the people handle those issues, and this is where the maturity part comes in. Those people who have had successful threesomes face the issues head-on ("
") and deal with them. Those who do not...well, don't, or can't. Trying anything new tests a relationship.
Marriage tests a relationship. Threesomes are no different. That something will pose new challenges and will require effort to make it work is no excuse not to do it.