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my perspective is as follows: on one hand, i understand jinn's arguments and technically agree with them. i don't think you're responsible for another's relationship - and ultimately it's not you who would be breaking your word. if you had slept with one of these chicks, i'm sure you'd be just fine the next day...and who can say what affect you might have on her / their relationship? you might force them back together, you might break up a bad relationship...however, as others have pointed out, you can't waste your time worrying about what happens to others, as it's completely out of your control.
to me, you have to ask yourself 'how important is this particular opportunity for making the sex? in the grand scheme, is it worth it?'
i inevitably come up with a big fucking 'NO'. you get involved in a shit storm of melodrama...maybe not every time, but often enough. as has been pointed out, you know in the back of your mind that you just caused some other guy a lot of pain, and you know that karma is a bitch and eventually it'll come back to haunt you. you know you could have just jacked off, like a good vince vega, and all of this would never have happened.
in the final analysis, your friend's comments are probably largely fueled by the fact that they weren't there, they're not involved, and maybe they don't often get laid, etc....like many normal guys. what they say, when they are not in the position of having to live with the ramifications, is completely irrelevant. wait and see what they do when they have to make the choices you have had to make.
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You don't love me, you just love my piggy style
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