Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Cervantes
I doubt I'd ever function in that kind of relationship but I've never been in one so there is no way for me to know for sure. But given the choices I'd say sharing and being shared is way (double waaaay  ) better an option than being alone looking for a new, nonexistent, True Love. (Ok I'm a bit cynical.. so sue me..  ) |
I think what you just said is that its better to settle to be a #2 than risk not being a #1.
Few men would go for that sort of thing, or be happy with it at least. Women are, as a group, more open to it, but even then all things being equal most would rather be the #1. Now what I used to think poly meant was there was no #2, everyone was #1 so to speak and I thought that sounded great, but once I got to meet poly's and read what they had to say I got introduced to the whole 'primary' thing which seems very 'un-poly' to me. Under the right circumstance I'd be willing to have another woman live with us and honestly my wife would be to if the circumstances were 'right'. That being said I'd have a 17 year history with my wife, she would always be '#1' regardless by default, we have to much of a past together so while someone new could be loved, she couldn't be 'equal'.
I would have to wonder if we would be doing this hypothetical female a real favor in the long run, preventing her from really finding what we as a couple have together.