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Originally Posted by Infinite_Loser
Humans, by nature, are possesive and selfish. We hate having to share. If at all possible, we want others to give us their undivided attention. Therefore, it's impossible to maintain a relationship involving more than two parties because it's impossible to show the same amount of affection towards each party member equally. In addition to only receiving part of someone's affection, there's the fact that one member will always be favored more than the other.
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for ME, this is the case. I can not bear the thought of sharing a partner. You may call it greed, you may call it unevolved, you may call it a throwback to an older timeframe with a more strict moral standard BUT.....
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I don't care who gets mad, but any relationship with more than two parties is doomed to failure.
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BULLSHIT! I myself may not be able to deal with this choice for ME, but I have witnessed more than one polyamorous relationship that was absolutely beautiful to behold. FMF, MFM, and so on, with EVERY piece of that individual machine equally as invested in the relationship as any other, every one of them completely happy with them selves, their chosen "mates" and their lifestyle. I flat out refuse to fault them for being able to find happiness.
Monogamy is a learned response to a society with a rigid "morality" structure. monogamy and swinging are (my opinion) greed based, and polyamorous lifestyle is by far (being an outside observer) the most giving and selfless
That being said. Swingers are : 2 people. 1 serious relationship with each other. "open minded" enough sexually to be able to swap partners with other couples, where a variety to their sex life is the desired result, while it being mutually understood by all parties involved that there is to be no sexual contact without the understood consent and prior knowledge of all parties involved. it is also the same for bringing an "additional" person into the bedroom, but NOT the relationship, for singular or mutual satisfaction of the parties involved in the sexual encounter. Swingers are interested in sexual variety, and are NOT interested in emotional ties to the parties from outside the relationship.
Polyamorous people are most commonly a couple that brings a third person into a pre-existing relationship for not only added sexual interest and variety, but because both parties in the base relationship are equally romantically interested in the individual or individuals brought into it. they feel they are emotionally stable and invested enough in each other that there is no question ever of one "loving the other MORE", but all parties are content, happily share life and love with their partners, and are far more interested in a permanence to the relationship than a swinging group would be. all the people involved in a polyamory relationship care a great deal about their partners, as their partners do them, and are far more inclined to build a more stable relationship emotionally than a swinging relationship, simply because of the solidity of the relationship, as well as the mutual wish of all parties involved that they be there for each other and contribute to each others happiness not only in a sexual manner, but in day to day life and happiness as well.
Find your happiness where you may people. I have my ways, you have yours, that person over there has theirs. Just because my choice id different than yours, dosent mean i dont know whats "really going on" or that I dont have complete respect for those of you that have been able to accept things that i cannot for myself. Kudos to those of you that are open minded enough to go for what you want.