Quote:
Originally Posted by Tirian
Cyklone - would you be so kind as to describe some concrete ways in which a man can communicate emotionally, and be vunerable ?
It might do us all a great service if you could.
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Women always complain that men don't talk about the way they feel. Two problems here, first, men are taught to ignore their feelings as children so they fail to recognise them. Secondly, we don't learn the language of emotion in the same way that women do. The best hint I can give is to listen to two women talking to each other about a problem. Also read a book called "the new male sexuality" by zilbergeld. It is a real eye opener.
We men are also taught to never be vulnerable, never give anyone a weapon they can use against you etc (talking about Aussie men here, but assume you Yanks are similar). We make excuses for not talking about the things that bother us with our partner. For example, she's got enough on her plate, I don't want to bother her, she wouldn't understand etc. Also, we all do things we regret, are ashamed of etc. When we talk about these things with our partner they learn who we are, they understand us, they know us in depth. In feeling that way they are more "in touch" with us, and more likely to jump your bones. Otherwise, after a few years of not talking about things that really matter because you've been tied up with raising kids etc, they start to feel as if you are a stranger. They feel lonely lying in bed next to you and they are vulnerable to the first stranger that comes along and talks to them about the way they feel. Take note that most women who have affairs will say that it was because he listened to her.