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Ustwo · 09-09-2007, 12:19 AM

Oddly I've found what women say they want in a man vrs what they really want in a man only mildly correlate.

I found that they key to womens happiness was changing the direction of the question.

The issue, I discovered was not trying to please the woman so much as convincing the woman you were worth pleasing. Now this sounds self serving and manipulative and perhaps it is, but its also what fits our nature. Even if you are snipped, she is tied, and on 4 forms of birth control, sex is still about reproduction. Its 100% chemical and its far older than our species. As such women want men who are strong, not necessarily physically, though it can help but mentally. Someone who can rise in status. A strong man doesn't grovel at a womans skirt so to speak. I figured this out in my late teens (after being rather unsuccessful in long term relationships) because despite being very attentive and everything you would think a woman would want in man, I was always sending signals that she could do better.

How does this translate into the real world? Its rather late and hard to explain in detail at this hour for me, but its basically letting her know that you are desirable and worthy of her doing things to make YOU happy. Instead of trying to impress her, give her chances to impress you.

Some men try to act like peacocks. They display and strut and attempt to woo the female with their actions, but we are not wired like peacocks. Peacock males do nothing for the female after sex, the female is stuck rearing the chicks all by herself. As such she picks the 'best male' and he shows off for her (and every other peahen out there, they are not monogamous). Acting like this is dooming you to failure, both short and long term.

As human child rearing is generally a two way en devour, you show your strength as a potential (and later as a) provider and protector. Its not something conscious for most women, but to deny its there is to deny who we are. If you do this then those moved glasses are a little less irritating, she can forgive you for not changing the toilet paper roll, and she won't be quite so upset if you don't make a big deal about the latest Hallmark Holiday.

Now a word of warning. I'm sure many have read this and interpreted it as me saying the key is to be a jerk. While apparently for some women that IS in fact something they seem to find attractive, thats not what I'm advocating. What I'm saying is show her that you are your own man, that you can do well without her if she decided to leave, that you don't NEED her even if you would prefer she is with you.

As for my qualifications in making these claims. Well evolutionary biology qualifications aside (and yes this is all found there) I've been married to the same woman for 10 years, and we have been together for 17, we were in a long distance relationship for a number of years without issue, we have two kids, most people would think we act more like newlyweds and I think we have the strongest marriage I know of.

09-09-2007, 12:19 AM	#35 (permalink)
Ustwo Pissing in the cornflakes	Oddly I've found what women say they want in a man vrs what they really want in a man only mildly correlate. I found that they key to womens happiness was changing the direction of the question. The issue, I discovered was not trying to please the woman so much as convincing the woman you were worth pleasing. Now this sounds self serving and manipulative and perhaps it is, but its also what fits our nature. Even if you are snipped, she is tied, and on 4 forms of birth control, sex is still about reproduction. Its 100% chemical and its far older than our species. As such women want men who are strong, not necessarily physically, though it can help but mentally. Someone who can rise in status. A strong man doesn't grovel at a womans skirt so to speak. I figured this out in my late teens (after being rather unsuccessful in long term relationships) because despite being very attentive and everything you would think a woman would want in man, I was always sending signals that she could do better. How does this translate into the real world? Its rather late and hard to explain in detail at this hour for me, but its basically letting her know that you are desirable and worthy of her doing things to make YOU happy. Instead of trying to impress her, give her chances to impress you. Some men try to act like peacocks. They display and strut and attempt to woo the female with their actions, but we are not wired like peacocks. Peacock males do nothing for the female after sex, the female is stuck rearing the chicks all by herself. As such she picks the 'best male' and he shows off for her (and every other peahen out there, they are not monogamous). Acting like this is dooming you to failure, both short and long term. As human child rearing is generally a two way en devour, you show your strength as a potential (and later as a) provider and protector. Its not something conscious for most women, but to deny its there is to deny who we are. If you do this then those moved glasses are a little less irritating, she can forgive you for not changing the toilet paper roll, and she won't be quite so upset if you don't make a big deal about the latest Hallmark Holiday. Now a word of warning. I'm sure many have read this and interpreted it as me saying the key is to be a jerk. While apparently for some women that IS in fact something they seem to find attractive, thats not what I'm advocating. What I'm saying is show her that you are your own man, that you can do well without her if she decided to leave, that you don't NEED her even if you would prefer she is with you. As for my qualifications in making these claims. Well evolutionary biology qualifications aside (and yes this is all found there) I've been married to the same woman for 10 years, and we have been together for 17, we were in a long distance relationship for a number of years without issue, we have two kids, most people would think we act more like newlyweds and I think we have the strongest marriage I know of. __________________ Agents of the enemies who hold office in our own government, who attempt to eliminate our "freedoms" and our "right to know" are posting among us, I fear.....on this very forum. - host Obama - Know a Man by the friends he keeps.