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Few suggestions
First and main one is talk to your Doctor about changing your medication - the extremity of your withdrawal is REALLY worrying me as someone who works in the health profession. Addiction to opiates is extremely dangerous and only becomes more so when you inidcated that you're going to be on the medication for an extended period (lifelong)
Secondly - start making appointments when you have a week or a week and 1/2 pain medication left. This is something I learnt when I hurt myself quite badly at work, this way if something stuffs up and you need to wait a few days for an appointment you usually have a few days spare meds.
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"I want to be remembered as the girl who always smiles even when her heart is broken... and the one that could brighten up your day even if she couldnt brighten her own"
"Her emotions were clear waters. You could see the scarring and pockmarks at the bottom of the pool, but it was just a part of her landscape – the consequences of others’ actions in which she claimed no part."
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