ShaniFaye: Generally speaking, I think it's true that most guys would not be happy if they discovered that their girlfriend masturbates to pictures of their friends. I can't say how I would feel because, frankly, it's impossible to know something like that until you're in the situation. Nonetheless, I would still say the same thing: provided there is not a deeper relationship issue going on (i.e. the girl wanting to break up with her b/f for his friend), the problem lies in the insecurity of the guy who is getting upset, not in the girl masturbating to pictures of his friends.
Saying that the root of the problem here lies in
burtsbees' insecurity is not the same as saying that her insecurity isn't understandable, or that the boyfriend has no role in this.
Of course it's understandable that
burtsbees would feel insecure about this, but this event alone did not
create the insecurity, it just helped bring out and amplify what insecurity was already there. Society trains most of us to feel insecure about things like this, and now is a perfect time for
burtsbees to explore whether or not this is really something to be so upset about. Again, assuming there are no deeper relationship issues here and the guy was simply fantasizing, as people are known to do, then what he did really isn't very meaningful. This is where the boyfriend comes in by the way. What he
did was not wrong, but nonetheless he needs to understand that whether it was wrong or not doesn't change how it has made
burtsbees feel. They need to work through this together with some very honest communication about how
burtsbees feels and also about how her boyfriend feels, both about her and about her friends. The only way
burtsbees is going to understand where her boyfriend is coming from is by talking about it with him, no matter how many times people here try to explain that there is often a difference between who a guy masturbates to and who he wants to be involved with.