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Originally Posted by SecretMethod70
I originally responded to this thread when it was posted in the Ladies Lounge (cause I'm an idiot and even mods aren't perfect  ), but since then there have been plenty of other responses. So, rather than paste what I originally wrote, I'll start off by saying: guccilvr, JStrider, dirtyrascal7, Manic_Skafe, ratbastid, and radioguy hit it right on the money. Note that these are all guys too, as am I, so it should give you an idea of how big a difference there is between who a guy masturbates to and who he wants to be with (the latter being you)). And World's King is partly right. No, you shouldn't all have an orgy, but you're boyfriend is also not really sorry for masturbating to the pictures. What he's sorry about is that it made you so upset. There's a big difference between the two.
Anyway, work on your communication together. It seems that you've started talking more openly about this, and you should continue to do so. If there's one post in this thread (so far at least) that deserves to be read multiple times, it's ratbastid's. You choose how to react to this. If your relationship is fine otherwise, then don't choose to make a big deal out of what your boyfriend masturbates to. Talk to him about it and learn to understand where he's coming from. Let him explain what the difference is, in his mind, between masturbating to pictures of your friends and dating you.
Oh, and while any orgy with your friends may not be the best idea, why not make some homemade porn of your own for him to masturbate to? |
First off, if not you, it might've been me responding.
I, too, wanted to ask a moderator if it could be moved to the sexuality foruum, because I don't believe getting the same mentality that was present there helped much to adequately assess the entire situation and gravity of the occurrence.
I see now that my thoughts on the subject have been clearly expressed already in the short interval in which I last checked. I did appreciate ratbastid's summation very much, yet I also felt some women had valid points to be less than pleased with what transpired. I see opinions that are too biased and condemning, while others do not clearly address the problem and perhaps do not realize why the OP has a justification to be upset and wracked. Not to repeat what has already been addressed is that this, like any other relationship, is based upon a foundation where communication and trust are key; to making it work well, last long, and flourish beautifully.
The bottom line is men seem to act without clearly assessing all the arguments beforehand, while the women analyze what had happened in a myriad of ways to no end instead of perhaps the one point that they seem to overlook. Internalizing the situation and constantly pondering what occurred leaves little room to simply ask the person(s) in question what their thought process was at the time.
If you can understand the how, what, and why, then can you finally uncover the elusive answer.