I have to agree with the judge, and those who say it's quite fair to ban the word rape and the word victim in this context.
What I think should happen is that she should say what he did to her, in logical/factual terms, and not be allowed to
appeal to emotion to make her case. Until the person she accuses of raping her is convicted (assuming that he is) she's legally not the victim, she's the accuser. Until such a time as the defendant is convicted, he's the accused, he's not a rapist, legally speaking. Just the facts ma'am, no emotional appeals.