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Your mod chip is possessed. There's nothing you can do about it being possessed, but you can show it who's boss by hitting it with a hammer a few times.
That oughta get it fixed.
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"Your name's Geek? Do you know the origin of the term? A geek is someone who bites the heads off chickens at a circus. I would never let you suck my dick with a name like Geek"
--Kevin Smith
This part just makes my posts easier to find
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