match000

Is honesty always the best policy?

Or, is a white lie better at times?

In the case of this thread, most of the TFP'ers have chosen to be point blank honest, and give their entire, 100% undiluted opinion.. stated in a very straightforward way (if not a little rude at times).

However, everyone was giving their honest opinion because they really *do* want to help the guy, and they feel that what they suggest would only save much trouble/drama/heartache for the guy down the road.

I'm sure that, psychologically, the OP probably came looking more for a boost (agreements on what he did) to assuage his *subconcious* guilt (since he doesn't seem to consciously be guilty).. but at the same time, if you are giving advice, and you are doing it out of a sense of truly seeking to help someone, then sure, you give them what you think and not some white lies or whatever you think he wants to hear. (unless, of course, he's suicidal or dangerous, at which point you need to do tell him whatever you need to help him stop being dangerous).

I guess my point is: you cannot blame the forum members for giving their honest opinions.. would you rather have this forum become a bunch of yes-men and yes-women? Nope. If I were to ask for opinions (and I sure have before), although I might not like what I hear, I do certainly appreciate the members giving me their full viewpoint..

I guess the real problelm was the undercurrent inherent in a few of the responses. It was so straightforward that it bordered on rude sometimes.