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Reading over this thread, there's one thing that strikes me... Well, I take that back, several things strike me, but there's one that hasn't really been touched on yet.
Several times you've said you had intended to "use" the ring, or that you intended it to "send a message".
The main function that money has, when it comes to any sort of interpersonal relationship, is communication. How we use money, where it relates to other people, is always intended to communicate something. So, laying aside for the moment the symbolism of it being a ring, my question is: what did you intend to "use" that $3000 gift for? What "message" did you intend that it send? What was her reaction going to be? What did you want to get out of it?
Although it's a vain hope, I know, I do hope you'll look at those questions honestly. What you're dealing with right now is the dissonance between all THAT, and all the things that actually happened in the actual world. So you want to start dealing with this by getting your head around exactly what your intentions and expectations were. Until you do this, you'll never be able to claw your way out of "creepy" in her eyes and the eyes of her siblings and your roommates.
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