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kpax, you're kind of missing the point. I'm going to be blunt, because you don't seem to be getting it.
That you even THOUGHT of buying this girl you barely know a $3000 ring as a "gesture" in case of an "extreme situation" (like her dating someone else) is weird and inappropriate. We're all telling you this. It doesn't matter whether you gave it to her or not. This is way over the top and the main message it sends is that you have no clue how to interact with women and you're living in some kind of fantasy world. What did you expect her reaction to be? If you think it would be anything but "geez, how weird, this guy I hardly know is giving me a gift worth more than many husbands present to their brides" you're delusional. It's not a romantic gesture. A romantic gesture for a woman you don't know well would be finding out her favorite flowers and having them delivered to her office. Or making her a mix tape of her favorite bands. If you'd been dating a woman for a year or more, then maybe a $3000 ring would be a romantic gesture. In this case, it's JUST PLAIN CREEPY. It's beyond all proportion for what your relationship with her actually is, and it says that 1. you have blown her up in your mind to some objectified ideal, and 2. you lack judgment.
If you like a girl and want to send a message, how about SAYING to her "I really like you and would like to spend some time with you" instead of blowing the equivalent of several months' salary on a "gesture?"
I echo the advice to find counseling. Your cognitive and emotional gears are obviously not meshing, and it's probably not just in this situation.
Best of luck.
__________________
"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."
- Anatole France
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