I don't see that it is all too difficult to understand how music can function as a perfect unchangeable commodity. Just look at how music works on us. It appeals to us on a number of levels. It is not just sonorous noise. It carries meaning through our interpretation (what do you think of when you hear the 9th?), through association (a song once danced to when I was young heard today brings back that memory), through cultural significance (youth listening to the music of their generation do so frequently because it sonically assaults their parent's ears)... the list goes on.
A loved piece of music settles on our minds and triggers all kind of good feelings and memories.
That said, it isn't always about hearing the same thing over and over (though I agree this is likely the case the majority of the time). A sample in hiphop, a remix, a mashup, a cover song all to varying degrees take an original song and make it into something new. Enjoyment is found in the play between the original version and something new.
That said, I can understand why people latch onto one song vs. another. Is it a passive experience? Largely yes. But then, most cultural enjoyment is passive. There is little room to add meaning a recorded music production (unless you are using it in some of the things I listed above but at that point you are more or less an artist and less of a listener - though I suppose you can be both).
I don't know what a perfect piece of music is. I don't think anyone really does other than to say that there is a song they like to listen to over and over for whatever reason they might have (if they are even conscious of their reasons for liking the piece in the first place).
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