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Originally Posted by abaya
Even if the marriage is unhappy, that doesn't mean it deserves to be disrespected at the first sign of "freedom" or whatever. 
Sultana, I am so very sorry to hear all this... I have been following your journals and this thread, and I just keep wishing for better news. I am going to keep wishing... but above all, take care of you, alright? We're definitely here for you.  |
Thank you so much abaya (and EVERYONE else). I...am still trying to process this, not over-react, etc.
I don't necessarily think it's automatically disrespectful, in that he's not running out and doing it, it doesn't seem something his heart is set on, he is still treating me ok (that's actually hard. On the surface, things look exactly the same. He still smiles at me, helps me out, says he loves me. He says the things he says so reasonably and calmly, I feel like I'm crazy. Outright anger and mistreatment would help things along), he's asking for ground rules to be set up. He's not immediately running and and doing whatever/whomever, regardless of how I feel. He doesn't even sound like he'd be upset if I "didn't allow" it...but like you guys have said...there's a desire there. At least he's not hiding it. Is just having the desire enough to ruin a marriage? I do absolutely trust him, alright? If he was gonna do something, I don't think he'd be this up-front and willing to alk about it.
That's something, anyways.
I will carefully consider all your input. Thank you for being so sweet and caring. But don't make me cry at work!
