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Originally Posted by Sultana
Has it ever occured to you that perhaps your attitude of suspicion and distrust that verges on disrespect is the reason you have not found (or allowed yourself to recognize) many females who disprove your negative stereotypes?
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Nope.
Don't take it personally and get all defensive because I have simply stated my observations and experiences concerning female behaviour.
Sorry, but it's my experience that women are very very coy about what they
really want. I truly believe that women say that they are looking for all the "nice" things in a guy because it's what and how society expects them to say and behave. What they SAY they want and what they REALLY want are two different things.
Now, I'm not saying that they DON'T want all those nice things like intelligence, confidence, sense of humour, etc, HOWEVER, it is my experience that simply having all that is not enough for a man. A man who is attractive will have much more success with women than one who is not.
I realize that long term, you need to have all the "nice" qualities, but as a male, you need to get the door open and looks are what women notice first.
Ask a guy who is 5'-6" tall and who is intelligent, witty, confident, romantic just how easy it is for him to find women.
I have many female friends, and I have dated more than a few women myself. I am speaking from experience. One of my best friends is female (platonic for over 20 years.) She's a university educated, liberal thinker, English teacher. She always says that she is looking for a guy with all those "nice" qualities. I've personally introduced her to two such nice guys. She never finds them interesting and she will always say, "there's no chemistry" Why - cause they aren't hot or masculine enough to get her wet. She's not the only woman like that that I know.
It reminds me of a study they did on female response to porn. They took a sample of women and asked them what type of porn turned them on. They got such proper responses as "romantic" "soft candle-light" the sort of Fabio / Harlequin Romance thing. When they measured these women's physiological response to sexual images they found that quite the opposite was true. That all the fem porn in the world really didn't elicit much of a response, however, Uncle John and the stable hand dragging a girl into the barn and letting her have it got quite the response.
Experienced men know that women say one thing but really mean something completely different all the time.