It depends on 1) whether I'm carrying any change or singles (which I'm often not) and 2) how they ask.
There are a wide variety of ways people ask for money in Chicago. There are some who try to trick you - start out by asking for help with directions, or say they're looking for pledges for some charity walk - and I almost never give them anything. It's not because I think they don't need it, or because I think they'll waste it on drugs or anything like that. I simply don't respect the deceitful way in which they ask.
On the other hand, there are a whole lot of people who are kind, respectful, and honest about it. To those people, I am much more likely to give money. Again, it's not so much that I think I have the right to judge the others, but I can't give to everyone I come across and this is how I filter people out. Furthermore, I'm most likely to give to those who are doing something for the money: performing at the El station, selling Streetwise, etc.
Awhile back, I read an article which I thought made a very important point. Regardless of whether or not you're going to give the person money, it's important to at least acknowledge their presence. Even something as simple as saying, "sorry, not today," goes a long way towards reaffirming the humanity of someone who has been pushed to the margins of society and is ignored by most everyone. Around where I went to school in Chicago, there were a few people who consistently hung out in particular locations, and they tended to be relatively friendly and non-demanding. I can only attribute this to the fact that they were treated as human beings by many of the students who passed them every day, to the point that some of them were known by name and quite popular among many students. Regardless of the money they are given (or not given as the case may be), this kind of human interaction is important in two ways: it not only reaffirms their worth as a human being, but it helps keep those who are more fortunate connected to those who are not doing as well in life.
ItWasMe: Sadly, Illinois suffers from a similar situation.
EDIT: Found the article:
http://www.wired.com/culture/lifesty...urrentPage=all
Oh, the (Lack of) Humanity
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Quote:
Oh, the (Lack of) Humanity
Commentary by Tony Long
11.09.06 | 2:00 AM
Slipped a homeless guy a buck the other day. After he mumbled off down the street, my companion sniffed her disapproval: "It only encourages them, you know. And he'll just use it for drugs or alcohol."
I had looked him squarely in his gimlet eye. I could smell his breath. Safe to say she was right.
"Who the hell cares what he uses it for?" I said. "If it kills the pain for a few hours, I'm happy to help."
The do-gooders call this "enabling" and in their simple, black-and-white world this can do the poor street addict nothing but harm. I'll agree it does him little good. But in the moment it took me to fish a dollar from my pocket, press it into his dirty hand and wish him luck, I connected with him, one human being to another.
I'd suggest that's more helpful than stepping over the guy like he's a piece of garbage, or lecturing him about the importance of personal responsibility when he asks for spare change.
But never mind. This isn't about clinics or shelters or 12-step programs. All that stuff comes after the fact, after the horse (quite literally, in some cases) is out of the barn. Sometimes they help straighten someone out, and sometimes they don't. Life's a crapshoot with no guarantees.
I don't know what this guy's particular problems were or why he landed on the street. Maybe he's a psychological train wreck. Maybe he inherited his addictions, or created his own. Maybe he's a war veteran who never readjusted to civilian life. Maybe his dot-com stock options weren't worth the paper they were printed on and he was dumb enough to think that they would be. Or maybe he's one of a growing number of people who simply dropped out, unable to cope with the insane pressures of modern life.
That last one should not be overlooked as a contributing factor to what is an increasingly dysfunctional society. A lot of people are feeling the effects of a world that simply moves too damned fast. Most of us deal with the pressure and ignore the vague sense that life could be better than it is; a few Type A's even thrive on the chaos. But a lot of folks can't handle it. Or don't want to.
I've touched on this subject in previous columns and as long as the Luddite is spared, I'll continue thumping the tub. Human beings aren't hard-wired to run in fifth gear all the time.
Obviously, there's no returning to those kinder, gentler days of yesteryear. The Pandora's box of technology is open and can't be closed. So this isn't a pointless anti-technology screed. This is a plea-for-humanity screed. We need to set aside our way-cool toys just long enough to reclaim the ability to relate to each other. One to one.
I'm a native of San Francisco, a city that has, over the years, been justifiably proud of its live-and-let-live attitude. But things have changed in the old town in the past decade or so. I can't remember a time when the place was less tolerant -- of the down and out, of the different, of just each other. Saying that we mirror society at large is cold comfort.
Tolerance (I mean real tolerance, not the half-baked, politically correct BS that passes for tolerance these days) has eroded as the money has come to town and the pressures of life have increased.
The phony dot-com green that rolled in during the late '90s nearly killed San Francisco. Rents soared, the working class nearly vanished and the city threatened to morph into a Disneyland for affluent teenagers. We survived, thanks to the bubble bursting, but barely.
But a lot of self-involved yuppies are still around, still wrinkling their noses in disgust at every down-and-outer they pass. Unless, of course, they simply ignore the poor bastard. It's unseemly behavior in the city of St. Francis. But it's equally unattractive in any place that values the importance of a single human being.
So the next time a bum tries to cadge a buck out of you, at least have the courtesy to pull the earbuds out and engage him as a fellow human being. Don't give him any money if you don't want to. But acknowledge him. He's not a blot on your aesthetic little world. If he is, well, your problems are bigger than his.
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