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my post would be exactly the same. I recently went through this with my ex-fundamentalist lutheran girlfriend- while there is more going on in this thread than a belief change (which i didn't really realize before but ratbastid brought up a good point) it's still a very similar situation.
Sex is just an activity. The interpretation is completely subjective to the person. It can be a conduit to share your feelings with another in an intimate way, a totally personal release, a momentary diversion, or a guilty pleasure.
For my girl the whole religious doctrine of sex = sin, danger/bad/evil/scary gave her a lot of fear about it and when it came down to it she didn't want premarital sex because then she could put it off to the last minute and "get it over with". When you relate sex to the same level as pulling off a bandaid, there may be a completely different level or barrier of communication between you and your boyfriend aphrodite.
Not too mention on top of that he's been personally told that he sucks at sex, multiple times.
He doesn't mind recieving pleasure though, to the point of overcoming his fear/rationalizations. If you show him that it can be rewarding or pleasurable to go farther than just a blowjob it may help?
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"Asking a bomb squad if an old bomb is still "real" is not the best thing to do if you want to save it." - denim
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