I've thought about the topic of this thread for the last month or so, and I find myself agreeing with our mystery member up to a point but vehemently disagreeing beyond that point.
Since I was asked to be a part of the staff, I will admit to changing my posting habits. I no longer log on to solely look for a good discussion or to revisit an earlier disagreement. Now I find myself first reading with the guidelines in mind and then as a member. I've stopped myself from posting in threads where I think I might have otherwise expressed an opinion because my role as a moderator comes first. And you know what? I'm ok with that. It may be different for the rest of the staff, but it's what I need to do for myself.
That said, I think that there are a lot of posts that closely approach the violation point. I can think of one thread where I may have been close myself. With that, I agree with the OP.
I strongly disagree that this is a problem, however. The bounds of good taste and manners are variable from day to day and person to person, and what is perfectly acceptable in one situation is a bannable offense in the next one. By my own estimation, about 40% of what I post is in Politics, and the folks there have to express an opinion if they're going to post anything at all. Honestly, that's the most difficult portion of TFP to moderate IMO, as hinted at by the OP, but I think that in the last few months Politics has, by and large, been a relatively friendly place than in the past. Part of that is, of course, some missing personalities, but a much larger part of the equation is the higher level of civility generally apparent there.
I've posted this elsewhere, but my mother always taught me that it's rude to discuss religion or politics with anyone. Given that those discussion is a part of the charter of this site, it is impossible that feelings will never get hurt. When they do, however, it is important that the staff know about it, as Secret pointed out above:
http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showpos...24&postcount=6
I will never agree 100% with anyone here, but honestly, I don't want to. One of the reasons that I started posting again here after a couple year's layoff was because of the differences in personalities, beliefs and interests. If we all agreed on everything, this place would be boring.