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I think you are doing the right thing. Maybe see if you can go along with her to her counseling session at some point just so you can know where she stands and the counselor will probably better understand the situation. That or get a couples counselor but she may not want to do that. I don't blame you for initiating sex, I would do the same thing. If the counseling is working then she'll probably be able to tell you if she really doesn't want to do anything. It sounds like she just needs some time. I haven't been raped but I've been through something similar so I can tell you that it's entirely possible for you two to develop a healthy sex life.
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My life is one of those 'you had to be there' jokes.
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