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so il, what's the communication between y'all at present? it sounds like you're not in touch; that would be the first situation you'd need to deal with. if i'm hearing you correctly, y'all had a nice little messed up relationship for a while. some time off, decided to give it another try - you couldn't deal with the images of her cheating on you, you said some unpleasant things, and now...
if you think you want to give it another shot, then you need to open up the lines of communication with her. i also happen to know you can be one stubborn motherfucker, and i would suggest that you let some of that go when you get in touch with her. y'all may not be able to date again, you might just need closure and then chalk this one up as a learning experience. that's a possibility, and in some ways it sounds as though y'all don't make happy things together, but there's always that possibility of making a decent relationship out of it if both of you can let some of the past slide.
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You don't love me, you just love my piggy style
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