abaya

No, I got your earlier post, thanks.

But here's the thing. Obviously, sex without consent is rape. I get that. But in my case, the guy was drunk (he said), I was clearly drunk, and I was asking *him* to go back to his place... because I thought he was actually a friend of mine that I knew (I was that fucked up).

Basically, I was acting like I was sober (which happens when you are blacked out, apparently) and thus giving "consent," even though if I was REALLY sober, there's no way in hell I'd have gone home with that dude. It was like I was an utterly different person, both mentally and physically. Extremely surreal and disturbing.

So was I giving consent? My words and body were giving consent, though it was not my true "self" that was really speaking. Apparently, I said yes the whole time and enjoyed myself (again, his account, and my fuzzy memory from when I began to sober up). I thought I was having sex this friend of mine, not a stranger. How could that case have EVER stood up in court?

If I had accused that guy of rape, I'm sure someone would have thought that I was taking advantage of the situation, since by all accounts I would have appeared to be giving consent. Would that be abusing the system? I kind of think it would be.

__________________
And think not you can direct the course of Love;
for Love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.
--Khalil Gibran