I guess I can't help. I'm a girl and I don't go in for softcore, thanks--gimme nasty fetish stuff anyday (like really hardcore John Thompson bukkake stuff, for instance)....So I guess my only advice is: Don't assume she'll be into softcore/foreplay stuff just cuz she's a chick. There's so much niche porn out there...if you can get her to tell you her favorite fantasies, you can probably find stuff that will push all her hot buttons, whatever they may be.
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