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I'm usually a demanding person in relation to the kind of friendshipI expect from others. But my experience in my life with my closest friends has taught me a little bit more about this.
I'm demanding with the way I'm treated and the kind of respect I get, but I try to not measure their consideration of me by the amount of time we are in touch.
Most of my closest friends from childhood moved away to other countries when we finished school, and contact with some has become less frequent than it was. There are also phases when there is increased contact and then others when it is less so. But at no point did I doubt their friendship or the closeness of our bond. Because I knew how they felt, because we have always talked openly about that. I regularly tell my close friends how important they are to me, and they do the same in return. So we feel "secure" if you will. We know that sometimes one of us is busy and has a lot to deal with, or is going through a more isolated phase, and we just wait it out. We always come back.
I also have made friends since then, who keep in touch less but are still in the same country as me, or city. I still really like them and if they call me, I'm going to meet up with them if I can. And I've never regretted doing that because every time I meet them again it's like old times and I am reassured that they are still my friend and still think of me.
I understand what you girls are saying about one way relationships, but I think nowadays it's pretty easy to neglect relationships because our lives are so hectic. I try not to be too harsh and give people the benefit of doubt - especially if they are/have been important in my life before.
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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.
Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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