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Originally Posted by hagatha
I've been thinking about dating and after an informal survey, was wondering if in this post-feminist world the art of romance is dead.
I have talked to woman who are dating older men, that is men in their late 50's and up, and there is a decided difference in their approach to relationships. There's candlelight, spontaneous romantic gestures (coming over with all the fixings for a romantic dinner) and thoughtful gifts for no reason.
For my other friends dating men under 45, its like everything is 50/50 and they bemoan not feeling special. The feeling that they are being taken for granted happens rapidly once they've had sex.
In this age of accessible birth control and the expectation of premarital sex, has the idea of courting a woman gone out the window? Has the quest for equality resulted in women no longer being seen as worthy of real effort by men raised in a post-feminist society?
Just wondering.
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First, if your dating "modernized or feminized men" then you are the one who is to blame for lack of romance. Maybe you expect too much and with such expectations you miss the little things you guys attempt to do for you. Pay attention. Talk to one of your guys and see if they feel like you don't appreciate their attempts to be romantic. Rarely one expectations are superceded by reality, unless one is forever optimistic AND sees good in everything, a rare quality albeit slightly annoying.
Secondly, redefine feminism. The women you consider to be feminists may just be more outgoing and less uncomfortable to speak to men and ask them to date or hook up casually.