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Socrates · 01-08-2007, 10:52 AM

Hello everyone, I'm sure some of you remember my earlier problems I was having. My parents dealing with issues and their health problems etc etc. Regardless, our problems seem to be at a minimal and everything is going good EXCEPT for one major thing. Considering I am 21 years of age, have to go to school, work, take care of myself, hit the gym, start up on martial arts as well as my other responsibilities, it just seems that as of late my activities ARE taking a lot of my time and I'm not home a lot. During my semester off, I was working about 11- 13-hour shifts so I can stock up on cash for the semester and don’t have to struggle as much because my parents really can’t help me too much since they are financially constrained themselves.

The thing is that I try my best to take care of house, cleaning up, cutting the grass, picking up leaves, washing their cars, sweeping, mopping, pretty much as much as I can do BUT sometimes it feels a little bit too much because I have so much other crap going on THAT I need to take care off. I will be working part-time this semester because it is necessary right now HOWEVER, my father continues to bring up the fact that how I need to stay home and spend time with my family and take care of the house. I feel as if there is so much out in the world that I’m missing out on, I actually have now on 2 friends I talk to and only 1 I hang out with since the other is going to school out of town.

It just feels that my parents are depending on me way too much where I’m not even on my feet yet, sh** my credit hasn’t even started building up yet and their already putting responsibilities that I try my best to take care off. With all the pressure that is already on me they keep dumping more pressure on me to please them. My father works only 5 hours and sometimes he calls me up telling me to cover his shift while Im doing something or I have just come from my other job, I hate to refuse BUT I have to because I’m very tired my damn self. He even says that he is depending on me and that I need to take care of the house etc etc but I think he IS using me. I usually don’t say anything and do as told but it’s getting to a point where I’m pretty much carrying them on my back. The only difference right now is that I’m not paying THEIR bills but the way things are going with my dads business and my moms job, it’s probably going to end up the way I for see it.

Am I wrong for thinking this way because I honestly don’t know any people my age that have to do so much and still keep their sanity. I usually don’t tell people my problems because I’ve learned that there is really no point in complaining HOWEVER it seems that my parents are always the one complaining. My little sister is growing up and she is putting up with a lot of their bullsh** too which isn’t fair either. Since Im only going to be working on the weekends my dad casually brings up the fact how I shouldn’t work over the weekends and stay home and clean-up not realizing the fact that I have to pay for gas, car-insurance, maintaining my car, food (considering their isn’t much home most of the time), tuition, books etc etc. Everything freakin adds up and costs money and I’m not at that stage anymore where I can just stay home and expect them to provide for me.

Anyone got any suggestions comments or should I just continue on trying my best hoping it will pay off for the future or am I being a selfish bastard.

01-08-2007, 10:52 AM	#1 (permalink)
Socrates Upright	Parent Dependency.... Hello everyone, I'm sure some of you remember my earlier problems I was having. My parents dealing with issues and their health problems etc etc. Regardless, our problems seem to be at a minimal and everything is going good EXCEPT for one major thing. Considering I am 21 years of age, have to go to school, work, take care of myself, hit the gym, start up on martial arts as well as my other responsibilities, it just seems that as of late my activities ARE taking a lot of my time and I'm not home a lot. During my semester off, I was working about 11- 13-hour shifts so I can stock up on cash for the semester and don’t have to struggle as much because my parents really can’t help me too much since they are financially constrained themselves. The thing is that I try my best to take care of house, cleaning up, cutting the grass, picking up leaves, washing their cars, sweeping, mopping, pretty much as much as I can do BUT sometimes it feels a little bit too much because I have so much other crap going on THAT I need to take care off. I will be working part-time this semester because it is necessary right now HOWEVER, my father continues to bring up the fact that how I need to stay home and spend time with my family and take care of the house. I feel as if there is so much out in the world that I’m missing out on, I actually have now on 2 friends I talk to and only 1 I hang out with since the other is going to school out of town. It just feels that my parents are depending on me way too much where I’m not even on my feet yet, sh my credit hasn’t even started building up yet and their already putting responsibilities that I try my best to take care off. With all the pressure that is already on me they keep dumping more pressure on me to please them. My father works only 5 hours and sometimes he calls me up telling me to cover his shift while Im doing something or I have just come from my other job, I hate to refuse BUT I have to because I’m very tired my damn self. He even says that he is depending on me and that I need to take care of the house etc etc but I think he IS using me. I usually don’t say anything and do as told but it’s getting to a point where I’m pretty much carrying them on my back. The only difference right now is that I’m not paying THEIR bills but the way things are going with my dads business and my moms job, it’s probably going to end up the way I for see it. Am I wrong for thinking this way because I honestly don’t know any people my age that have to do so much and still keep their sanity. I usually don’t tell people my problems because I’ve learned that there is really no point in complaining HOWEVER it seems that my parents are always the one complaining. My little sister is growing up and she is putting up with a lot of their bullsh too which isn’t fair either. Since Im only going to be working on the weekends my dad casually brings up the fact how I shouldn’t work over the weekends and stay home and clean-up not realizing the fact that I have to pay for gas, car-insurance, maintaining my car, food (considering their isn’t much home most of the time), tuition, books etc etc. Everything freakin adds up and costs money and I’m not at that stage anymore where I can just stay home and expect them to provide for me. Anyone got any suggestions comments or should I just continue on trying my best hoping it will pay off for the future or am I being a selfish bastard.