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Uncle Phil refuses to donate his body to science when he dies because science still owes him for that investment in robot penises he made back in the early '90s. Boy, that one sure didn't pay off, did it?
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Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
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