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Originally Posted by LoganSnake
I find it interesting that I only have problems with some of the things you say (why only you, I have no idea, so don't ask) and not others.
You really think that a parent taking away his or her child's drivers license is theft? I was under the impression that as long as the child lived in his or her parents house, he or she must obey their rules. If a parent rules that the child cannot drive for whatever reason, I see taking away their driver's license no more of an offense as taking away their car keys. It's a form of punishment.
I find it very upsetting that this country is so sensitive when it comes to child discipline. A neighbor sees you spanking your child, or giving him a good slap on the hand or ass and you got DHS at your door questioning you and your child. I believe that as long as force is used within reason (beating up your kid obviously warrants an arrest), it is perfectly acceptible until the child learns the consequences of his or her actions. As for depriving a child of food, that should depend on how old the child is and how often it is done. One or two times is fine, I think, although I wouldn't specifically use this method with my kids.
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Bravo! I also agree that as long as a child is in my home, and under my custody, I have the right as said parent to remove any and all rights above basic needs as needed to help he teach the child how to properly function in society. If I feel like taking their keys and license away would help them learn a lesson, then I have that right. As parents we are required to provide our children with food, shelter, guidance, and love. If I so choose, I can deny my child from even GETTING a license until the age of 18, therefore if they are in my home, I can take away said license. Heck, here in Florida, if a student has failing grades, the school can, at their discretion, notify the state, and the state can and WILL suspend a students license until the grades improve.
I hate seeing so many people coddle the children of today. I am ALWAYS hearing people complain about how children are growing up these days, yet the same people also want to say, you can't spank your child, or you can't take away this or that from them, because it is cruel. I SWEAR I sometimes want to hit THEM and say WAKE UP! I raise my children just the same way I was, with them knowing that there are consequences for EVERY action that is made, be it good or bad consequenses. Do good in school? then say to them "You did as EXPECTED, and for that, we will go to the beach this weekend" I ALWAYS expect good grades from my children, but I also know that there is a realistic standpoint. Each of my kids know that when I see their report card, the first thing I ask them if it isn't all 'A' grades? Did you HONESTLY try your best? If they can tell me they did, then I don't care about the grade, I ask them what can I do to help them.
Now back to the OP, As pretty much every parent on this board will agree, raising a child is a 24/7 job. And not every child will respond to the same methods. Heck, my two daughters are a perfect example. I raised them both the same way, and my 15 year old is a model child, good grades, helps out in school and volunteers her own time at the local church and charity events, while the 12 year old has been acting up and doing terribly in school, to the point of having tutors and a child counselor.
The biggest thing I have learned over the years is this: WHATEVER the child is doing, there is a direct corelation to SOMETHING they have seen or had happen. They don't act out for the heck of it. What you need to do is find the ROOT cause of their behavior, and it might take some time. Yes, punishment is needed as a direct interation to let the child know that lying and damaging school property is NOT acceptable bahavior, but too many parents just punish their child, and then go on like it's all over. You need to find out WHY the child did this, and address that as well. I don't know your parenting, or the way you do things yourself, but children soak up things like a SPONGE! You may notrealize it, but they see and hear EVERYTHING....lol. A perfect example, similar to your situation: My oldest daughter when she was in i believe 3rd grade, was always lying. She lied to us, the teachers, other family members. We continued to punish her, and she STILL did it. I finally sat down with her and asked "Why are you always lying?" and she looked me dead in the face and said to me "You lie to MeMaw all the time!" I was shocked and asked her when? She told me that every time my mom wanted us to visit, I always lied to her and said we were too busy, or something had come up. I NEVER thought that she would have known this, much less realized that she was there when I was talking to my mom on the phone. So make sure also that the child isn't getting some poor influence from somewhere else.....
Just my $.02 worth....Gotta get back to work
(OH and Will, PLEASE forgive my grammer...lol. I wrote this in a hurry...)
