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Originally Posted by IT2002
One meal is not child abuse.  Children should be held accountable for their actions. I stated that I was not equating dinner with TV/video games and yet you claim that I am. Are you trying to be rude? Or is there a better explanation? |
If you equate something, then you say you aren't equating them, you're sending a very mixed message. And suggesting that a child be sent to be before dinner once may not be child abuse, but if that parental behavior is in any way consistant, e.i. maybe missing 4-5 dinners a month, then it is very unhealthy for the child and the parents are being not only neglectful, but are bad parents. Starvation is abuse, and not eating between 12 noon and maybe 7-8 am the next morning can cause moderate to severe pain and effect digestion and energy for days. Am I trying to be rude? No, I'm trying to prevent child abuse.
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Originally Posted by IT2002
Shouldn't you get good grades anyway. Weren't you saying that rewards aren't the way to parent. You would've learned more if you worked a job and paid for your own car. Also, your Dad wouldn't be able to do whatever he wanted with your "reward". Are these your words? "The thing is: anything you make in to a reward will be, after a time, galvanized as a reward in the mind of the child."
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Shouldn't you get good grades anyway? Not necessarily. My grades in my photogtaphy class wouldn't have meant a thing on my transcripts, or to me personally since I don't care for photography. I got the grades in order to teach myself dicipline and to get my dad's beater. My dad gave me the car as a reward for good grades; as an example of how good behavior proven to an authority figure can be rewarding. The same rules apply now when I do well at work and get a bonus. The car reward was, of course, one time. If I had recieved a car every time I had good grades, I'd probably have a very different opinion about cars now as an adult, right? That's the point.
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Originally Posted by IT2002
Your Britney Spears analogy is a nice red herring. What sort of wine are you serving with that? Her parents didn't give her those millions.
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It's not a red herring, it's an attempt to lighten the mood. Aparently, it'll take more than picking on an untalented, teenage(?) pop star to fix this mess.
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Originally Posted by IT2002
The state grants licenses, it doesn't award them. Yes, a parent can pull a license. The state still recognizes their driving priveledges.
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Well now that's a very perception based semantics argument waiting to kill the thread. A reward is something given or received in return or recompense for service, merit, hardship, etc. Would studying and taking a test fit under hardship, service, merrit, etc.? Probably. Therefore, it is a reward.
What do you mean "a parent can pull a license"? Are you talking about a parent taking the drivers license of their teenage child? If so, no, they cannot 'pull a license' any more than I can 'pull a car stereo from a car I'm breaking into'. Theft is theft. A drivers license belongs to it's driver, whether that driver is 17 or 42. That would be like my boss punishing me by taking my car. He doesn't have that authority.