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Originally Posted by shesus
I'm guess this is to me since helter skelter is used. No, as others have mentioned that is a deal breaker for me. I never wanted to be with a guy that slept with random people and I never was. If I found out they were, end of relationship for me. The only reason I mentioned this is because the OP asks if she should tell and if it would make a difference. As some people stated it wouldn't matter, but other people do care about that. Same with smoking, drinking, or any action that people do.
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Shesus, I hope you were not offended by my comments. To be clear, I do think it's perfectly fine and normal to have arbitrary reasons to not date someone... hell, that's normal. People are human, and it's absolutely necessary and healthy to know one's deal-breaking limits. I think what the OP is trying to figure out is this very issue... what are her limits, and what might be the limits of someone she'd like to marry or date seriously in the future?
My only issue (and not with you) was the inconsistency I saw between people who see prostitution as a deal-breaker (which is valid) and even morally condemn a woman for seeking that job, and yet may very well go support the very same industry of sex-for-money with their own money and/or time. Why the difference? Why not just support someone who once did something that you also enjoyed watching, as long as that person was clean and careful and participated of her own will? (for the record, I am also seeing quite a few people voice that opinion here, and I'm glad for that)
I see this as being some kind of cognitive dissonance, double-standard, etc, and it bothers me. It would be like if I refused to date a smoker because that was a deal-breaker for me and I considered it somehow "wrong," but then went out and bought stock in the tobacco industry or something. Maybe a poor analogy, but you get my drift?
Meh, this thread is an interesting discussion, but it is a bit of a threadjack. I retire.