Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - Getting breast implants at hubby's request?

Sweetpea · 11-01-2006, 12:15 PM

Aside from the OP and plastic surgery. (I have no problem with plastic surgery of any kind, as long as the individual is doing it for themselves and not for anyone else)

this is not intended as a thread jack, I would just like to address some of the viewpoints being given in conjunction with this OP.

I have found in this thread the very common view that

a: women (or anyone who is being abused) can always just leave easily
and B: that it's her fault or at least partially her fault for being in the situation

There is alot to be understood about domestic violence/emotional abuse that is not and is often rife with misconceptions.
And I also aware that unless you've known someone personally who has been through this or have been though it yourself, I'm sure it's difficult to see the many complexities of the situations and make oversimplified assumptions.

First and foremost, having recieved my degree and worked in the social work field for some time now, I firmly believe through my experiences that the abuse is Never the abusers fault, plain and simple.
To place blame at all on the abused is to only perpetuate the myth that this is something merely walking out can solve and that it is a trvial thing that happens and that the woman (or man) can easily stop it or leave.

Keep in mind, these may look like very normal couples from the outside perspective, but behind closed doors, tremendous amounts of emotional abuse and/or physical abuse can take place.
Most people aren't aware that the most dangerous time for an abused individual is in the 48 hours right after they walk out. Statistically, this is when the most violence occurs which sometimes includes the murder of the abused. Even in an emotionally abusive situation that doesn't currently include physical abuse, there may be the threat of violence if he/she leaves.

" Prolonged exposure to violence and/or emotional tourture can have the effect of making the woman believe that she deserves to be hurt. It distorts confidence and some women may start to rationalize their partner's behaviour.
Women often blame themselves because they have been consistently told that the abuse is all their fault.
There is no justification for abuse."
http://www.newham.gov.uk/Services/Do...AndFactsDV.htm

/end threadjack

thanks,
sweetpea

11-01-2006, 12:15 PM	#40 (permalink)
Sweetpea Fade out Location: in love	Aside from the OP and plastic surgery. (I have no problem with plastic surgery of any kind, as long as the individual is doing it for themselves and not for anyone else) this is not intended as a thread jack, I would just like to address some of the viewpoints being given in conjunction with this OP. I have found in this thread the very common view that a: women (or anyone who is being abused) can always just leave easily and B: that it's her fault or at least partially her fault for being in the situation There is alot to be understood about domestic violence/emotional abuse that is not and is often rife with misconceptions. And I also aware that unless you've known someone personally who has been through this or have been though it yourself, I'm sure it's difficult to see the many complexities of the situations and make oversimplified assumptions. First and foremost, having recieved my degree and worked in the social work field for some time now, I firmly believe through my experiences that the abuse is Never the abusers fault, plain and simple. To place blame at all on the abused is to only perpetuate the myth that this is something merely walking out can solve and that it is a trvial thing that happens and that the woman (or man) can easily stop it or leave. Keep in mind, these may look like very normal couples from the outside perspective, but behind closed doors, tremendous amounts of emotional abuse and/or physical abuse can take place. Most people aren't aware that the most dangerous time for an abused individual is in the 48 hours right after they walk out. Statistically, this is when the most violence occurs which sometimes includes the murder of the abused. Even in an emotionally abusive situation that doesn't currently include physical abuse, there may be the threat of violence if he/she leaves. " Prolonged exposure to violence and/or emotional tourture can have the effect of making the woman believe that she deserves to be hurt. It distorts confidence and some women may start to rationalize their partner's behaviour. Women often blame themselves because they have been consistently told that the abuse is all their fault. There is no justification for abuse." http://www.newham.gov.uk/Services/Do...AndFactsDV.htm /end threadjack thanks, sweetpea __________________ Having a Pet Will Change Your Life! Looking for a great pet?! Click Here! "I am the Type of Person Who Can Get Away With A lot, Simply Because I Don't Ask Permission for the Privilege of Being Myself"