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The first drawing reads like the mirror (or whatever--we can't see from there) is on a table in a small, square room. Seems like we want the figure to be bigger, and maybe cut off at the forehead too, to really convey that we're looking out of a box at her. From the relative size of the case in the second drawing, it looks like we'd see her maybe down to her mid-chest, not to her knees.
The second one is hard to figure out because it looks like the artist ran out of space (which is just poor planning) around the top-left of the head. The mirror has to be tucked up into the corner of the display case in order to show up at all, and just LOOK at that right hand. Yikes. Also, the perspective of the case in the second drawing is seriously messed up. If it's meant to be square, or rectangular, it should all have one vanishing point. Its lack of consistent perspective makes it look like the back of the glass case is sinking into the stand.
I'm not saying I could do better--and I don't know what you're going for here--but I wouldn't say these convey quite what you want to convey.
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